People share their worst Valentine’s Day horror stories. Whether you hate how forced and cringey Valentine’s day can be or love everything about it, right down to those cheesy teddy bears in a mug, those who’ve ever celebrated the day, know how hit or miss it can be.
Scouring Reddit, a website that boasts a massive collection of forums, where people from all over the world can share news and content or comment on other people’s posts, we found tonnes of people sharing their Valentine’s day horror stories.
He got back with the hideous funeral flowers
y husband forgot last year. I saw the realisation wash over his face when he came in and saw the gift bag I had on display for him. He put on this big show of, “I just stopped to pick up my wallet. Gotta go pick up something I ordered last week.”
I stupidly tried to save him, saying something like, “It’s really no big deal, don’t even worry about it.” He insisted, though, and went to the grocery store to buy an enormous multicoloured flower arrangement that I swear must have been intended for a state funeral (and probably cost as much, too).
I felt so bad at that stricken look of panic on his face. It made me wonder, does he think I really care about St. Valentine’s day? Am I a scary wife, the kinda guy has to worry about screwing up with? Do I give off some sort of “PLEASE ME, OR ELSE” vibe??
How to pull off the perfect Valentines Day
So when he got back with the hideous funeral flowers, I made a fuss and put them right in front of the window – “so all the envious wives can see what they’re missing!” And then after dinner called my sister to loudly brag. I made sure to mention that I happen to know that orange gladiolus sprays usually have to be ordered at least a week in advance, especially in winter. I don’t even know how I come up with this shit, but it works. He was a proud and happy man. And I was happy, too. – SuzQP
So, ladies: if he forgets, don’t get upset. There may be a glorious spray of dead people flowers in your future and you sure don’t want to spoil the surprise! :)
Everybody loves a good half off sale
My ex boyfriend would always be “busy” on valentines day and then the next day he would buy all the sale valentine stuff at half price. – Merry_Pippins
My ex-husband proposed on V-day, thereby ruining all future V-days. – Evil_Nipples
My not so funny Valentine
While in nursing school my friend & I thought it might be funny to send the 5 guys in our class an anonymous invitation to get together after school for a drink at a certain cafe. We’d send them to their house fully expecting them to recognise it was a joke.
Well…. next day one of the guys asks the teacher for a moment to talk to the class and starts telling us that he received this card and his wife went crazy. She was now convinced that he was having an affair and threatens to divorce him. Needless to say, he was not amused by our little prank. We ended up going to his house together where we apologised humbly with flowers.
To this day I’m still not convinced she believed us! The other guys however found it hilarious and were all there for the meet, even though they already found out it was us of course. One of the guys carried a card from his girlfriend thanking us, saying that she had not seen him that happy for a while when he received our card. He was even singing in the shower, LOL, but the one with the angry wife, he never really spoke to us after that. – lxndrfn
Roses are red… and recycled
In high school, a girl gave me old withering roses that she had received from someone else and played it off as if she had got them specifically for me. – Anonymous
Dumped via text
I was once dumped on Valentine’s Day, in a text message, sent from a borrowed cell phone, by a guy who had made a huge deal multiple times about how his mom had always raised him to be a gentleman. – wisebloodfoolheart
From bad to worse
Last year I was living with my then boyfriend, we both had work in the daytime, but I had planned to cook a really nice steak dinner, I had gotten him a small present (as we had agreed not to spend too much as we didn’t have much money), but I had gotten him a really lovely card with a really nice heartfelt message.
We got home from work, and I was quite tired so I didn’t really change into anything nice, I gave him his card and gift when he got home and he said that he still had to write mine out. I brushed it off at first, maybe he just forgot, we had dinner and I asked for my card, he still hadn’t written it, but he did manage to play his games for an hour when he got in.
We ended up having a huge fight, because of how he didn’t even care about trying to make the day a little nice, I slept on the sofa that night and the next day he gave me the card that literally said ‘To Fabulous, from ___’ it was also the starting point to me realising I didn’t love him anymore and we broke up a few months later. – thefabulousbomb
It’s a “no” from this Valentine
Not me but a buddy of mine. Valentine’s day is his birthday. He wanted to ask a girl out, so he drove five hours to her college, gave her flowers, hung out with her and asked her out for a date in the future. To only be rejected all this on the most romantic day of the year, on a somewhat romantic move. On his birthday. – Anonymous